Ah. The completion of the first chapter. Ah. So good. Ah. And the best part of it is that it was actually quite good. The author has a very easy-to-comprehend style, he describes things very well, and the introductory characters are fascinating with an air of mystery into how they will evolve as the story progresses. Ah. I really am enjoying this.
In fact, I am rather impressed I got through the first chapter so well. It was a bit long, but it wasn't so bad. I'm sure I have already breached a good 10% of the book by now. Let me just flip to the end and calculate just how far I've gone.
Ah. Let's see. There's about 400 pages, ah... covering 29 chapters... um... an average of... 20 pages per chapter... eh... Give me a moment to check the word count here. Um. Was this book really this big when I picked it up? Um. Let me just get a calculator and...
Dear God. I've only completed 3% of the entire book. I've barely even... I thought I had... I mean... I know that I've only read the first chapter but... it just seemed like it had been a lot of work. I felt like I had accomplished something... but no. Nothing. It was just a tiny piece of a deceptively long... very long book. Oh, God, it's so long. I'm going to be another age before I finish it.
Maybe, if I redo my calculations, I'll simply realize that I made a mistake and I'll see that it's not quite as long as I thought it was. Yes. I am human. I do make mistakes from time to time. Let's just take a moment to breathe and reassess our situation.
...
What do you bloody mean 2%?! That's worse! I'll be reading this damned thing until the end of time! And what's worse: I can't just stop now! I'm invested! I already want to know what happens to Annie, Fauntleroy, and that weird tap-dancing cat named Doodlehopper! It was a trap!
Wait! Wait! Just calm yourself. Breathe. Relax. You've read long books before. Sure, you thought this one was much shorter, but that's okay. All books end. All you have to do is get there. Besides, you're reading two other books. Yes? Remember those? Yes. You've got plenty of slots to fill with great content. And when one of those books end, you can go right on to the next one.
I take solace in those words. I know that every long story must reach an ending just as easily as it has its beginning. I begin to feel silly. Just a little silly for panicking like I did. I can do this. All I need is time. Ah. Here we go... Chapter 2.
This blog was written on July 27, 2022.
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More often than not, long books are longer than they should be. The author rambles, describing things that should not be described and telling things that should not be told. Quite often, the excessive length is for commercial reasons, to sell a bigger product for more money. The author may be scatterbrained and simply has trouble getting to a point. If a book is somehow BETTER for being longer, then it is surely a work of genius.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind books being long. I'm still going to stress over it though. I actually stress over most books I read.
DeleteRelax, take it one chapter at a time and when you get to the end...stop haha. I'm glad it's proving to be a good book so far. Who could resist a tap-dancing cat ...
ReplyDeleteNobody I'd want to know!
DeletePatience is required to get through a long book. If you rush, you might miss something. It is not enough to take in literary material... it must be digested.
ReplyDeleteI am usually a chapter a day for each book I am reading. So three chapters a day.
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