Fairy Tale Spotlight: TimeSplitters 2 [Video Game Review]

"TimeSplitters 2" is a video game developed by Free Radical Design. It was released in 2002, two years after the original.

Here we have the first time the series really explains itself. There is an alien race called the TimeSplitters who are causing havoc throughout human history. Enter Cortez for the very first time. He invades the TimeSplitters space station and travels through time to find the stolen time crystals.

Weirdly, when Cortez goes through the portal, he takes on the form of different people. At first, it looks like it might be some sort of disguise, but in later levels, it seems like it is more of a quantum leap sort of thing. The cutscenes before each level go into the story of each character he ends up taking over, so that is the only conclusion I can come up with to explain it.

This game is at least 150% more developed than the original. It has plot, cutscenes, an interesting series of stories, and an absolutely exciting conclusion. No kidding on that last point. Cortez is a certified badass in this game. There's like nothing funny about him at all. The only weird thing is that his very last line is, "Time to get out of here." Yes, this was before he was turned into a funny character, using the line, "Time to split!" No, in fact, he is a very believable action movie star in this game of the Rambo variety.

Each mission has a rather large series of objectives you have to complete. It's usually straight forward, but there were a few times I missed something. (Like that damn communications dish on the very first level! Does that happen to anyone else?! Am I just stupid?!) This is much nicer than the first game which just had you do the same thing every time. In fact, the game's base design is actually a lot like "Goldeneye 007" and "Perfect Dark." This game seems like it is somewhere in between those two as far as content, but I am still very impressed.

The three difficulty settings for each mission are also a highlight for me. Now, I can't do Hard at all, but I do like to play on Easy first to get a feel for the mission, and then I'll switch to Normal. Normal usually adds more objectives and might even add new areas to the map. I really like that model. Like I said, Hard is just too much of a challenge for me, but Normal is right at the tippy top of my skill level, and I appreciate that.

The greatest thing about this game are the individual stories of each character that Cortez quantum leaps into. They really capture the feel of every timeline you find yourself in. I especially enjoyed the western mission. That was something that was missing in the first game. You also get to be a secret agent named Harry Tipper. He was in the first game too but cast as a sort of 70's cop. He is a lot better as a spy. If I recall, he is a 70's spy in this game and then you get to see the 60's version in the next, but I might be remembering it wrong.

All in all, "TimeSplitters 2" is still fun. It is still enjoyable, even after all these years. It even has a better map maker in it that you can play with. Really great stuff. I totally recommend it! I had a blast.

This blog was written on July 5, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: The Whimper of Whipped Dogs [Short Story Review]

[I spoil the main plot of the story, but nothing about the ending.]

"The Whimper of Whipped Dogs" is a short horror story written by Harlan Ellison. It was published in 1973. It is entirely inspired by the famous murder of Kitty Genovese. Apparently she was killed while tons of people watched and ultimately did nothing about it.

This story is about a woman named Beth who sees the murder. She doesn't want to get involved, as horrible as it is to see.  It focuses on her for the rest of the story as things just seem to get worse and worse for her. It's almost as if God is angry at her for her inaction.

Oh, but it isn't so much God as it is some sort of god. Like... its a god of street justice or something. I found the writing of this to be a bit unclear. Honestly, I found the story to be a little too angry and depressing. I get that what happened to Kitty was bad, but this story sounds more like narrative revenge than anything else.

It's like the city itself is sort of treating Beth like shit because of what she didn't do on the night of the murder. There is a market for stories like this. It's usually about poetic justice, but I just felt that the presentation of it just fell a bit short because of the author's unceasing anger. I can still see how some people might like this one though.

I know this is strange but I'm still going to recommend it. It's one of those times I just feel like a story is good enough but not necessarily for me. It be like that sometimes.

This blog was written on July 3, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: Tired of Running [Poem Review]

"Tired of Running" is a poem (I guess) written by Fritz Hamilton. It was published in 2012. This is going to be a short blog.

This poem, if you want to call it a poem, starts off with the author poetically going off about how difficult work is and how he is not paid enough and generally unappreciated for what he does. The hilarious thing is that, about half way through, it stops being a poem and ends up being a very angry rant that even outs the company's name that he is working for.

I actually began laughing at this. All poetry was thrown out the window, and he spent the rest of the page pumping out anger and hate for the people that had captured his ire. I don't think it was intended to be funny. It might have been. It's hard to say.

I actually work with someone who has a similar personality, but he doesn't write. All the rants come out verbally while he is working.

There is actually a chance that you could hate this poem. I can see how someone might read this and just get annoyed. However I did like it and I do recommend it. That's it.

This blog was written on July 3, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: TimeSplitters [Video Game Review]

"TimeSplitters" is a video game made by Free Radical Design back in 2000. It only ever came out on PlayStation 2. It is a first person shooter made by roughly the same people who made "Goldeneye 007" and "Perfect Dark" for the Nintendo 64.

The story of "TimeSplitters" is almost nonexistent. Each mission takes place in a different time period between 1935 and 2035. You play as random people who are going into dangerous situations in an attempt to get something that is important to them. In every case, you have to gun down anyone and everyone you see. There are no allies here. Whenever you pick up the item you need, the mission will suddenly be invaded by an alien race called the TimeSplitters. For some unknown reason, they are trying to disrupt what you are trying to do. Unfortunately, that reason is never explained. Not even a little. Not even a teeny tiny bit. This game has exactly zero cutscenes.

Every mission is just pick up an item and take it to an exit point. It never changes or gets more complex. Just get in, get the thing, and get out. Nobody really cares about the TimeSplitter aliens. It's just another obstacle to overcome in each mission. This is actually an interesting way to introduce an antagonist in a game. They did it in such a way as you would be curious but get nothing for that curiosity, and they must have figured people would come back for more because a sequel was literally promised in the credits.

This game was made in sixteen months and made with a very small budget. The idea was just to make it fun and get it out. It doesn't even look very good, but it plays smoothly. That was the point. Give them a bare bones story, but make it fun to play. They even made a map maker, where you could build and program your own levels, although this is very rudimentary in the first game.

Happily, this game was a success, and it led to what would become the "TimeSplitters" trilogy. It is a series that got better with every new entry. Even though the first game isn't much to look at, it set the tone for a good idea that would be built upon over the next years.

All said, however, this is not a very fun game to play. It is greatly obsoleted by the next two games in the series. I don't really recommend it for that reason. I still respect it for what it accomplished and the legacy it made for later years.

This blog was written on July 3, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: The Wizard of Oz: The Screenplay [Book Review]

"The Wizard of Oz: The Screenplay" is a book that came out in 1989. It is the word-for-word screenplay for the 1939 film "The Wizard of Oz." The screenplay itself was credited to Noel Langley, Florence Ryerson, and Edgar Allan Woolf. The book also included a very informative introduction by Michael Patrick Hearn. He also edited the book.

Just as an aside, this blog is a review of the book, not the movie. That is to say that I am not reviewing the movie or even really the script for that matter. I am doing this to help you decide if this book is worth the purchase. After all, if you've seen the movie, the script is really just the same content.

Firstly, the introduction by Michael Hearn was excellent. It was a comprehensive look at how the movie became what it was. It showed that it was a total mess from inception and right up to the beginning of filming. If you could only see what it looked like when the first script was written, you would not have even recognized it. It probably wouldn't have been a classic either.

Interestingly enough, Hearn is actually a well-known L. Frank Baum historian. He was the perfect person to task with this introduction. It was very easy to read, and I came out of it knowing far more about the movie's production than I had heard previously through rumor. It is a very interesting journey and well-worth the effort to read it before you get to the script.

The script itself is just like the movie, and it was intended to be that way. In fact, I am certain that it was prepared for this very sort of exhibition. The original script was probably a lot more bloated with cut content. What is nice about this book is that the editor flags you when you get to an alternate scene. It is either laid out at the bottom or placed in the appendix. This is where the book shines.

I actually began looking forward to these alternate or cut scenes. There were even entire cut musical numbers such as "The Jitterbug" which didn't make it into the film. You will finally get a chance to see how they would have played out with this book.

One cut scene that I found rather surprising was the "Rainbow Bridge" scene, where the witch attempts to trick Dorothy into crossing a rainbow bridge at her castle. She actually gets a Winky soldier to do it first, and he slips through it and falls to his death. But when Dorothy tries it, her ruby slippers begin to glow and saves her. Not a bad scene, but it was considered much too expensive to shoot.

A lot of the cut scenes were okay to let go, but there was one that I did feel bad about losing. It happens when the Wicked Witch leaves Dorothy in the tower with the hour glass. Dorothy does a very tearful and pitiful reprise of "Over the Rainbow." It's a very touching scene, and I have actually heard the recording of this. It's too bad that one got cut. It would have added to the movie quite a bit, without taking up too much time.

It wasn't really necessary, but I did like one cut scene where they exposed the Wizard behind the curtain. He started producing a bunch of silly parlor tricks as he attempted to explain himself. It was kinda goofy, but I liked it. I guess it did sort of make him too much like Professor Marvel at the beginning, but I think it would have gotten a pass.

All in all, I do recommend "The Wizard of Oz: The Screenplay." Just make sure you get the 1989 version published by Delta. That's the one I reviewed. I can't speak for any other version. It's well worth it for anyone who enjoyed the original film.

This blog was written on July 2, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: Metal Arms: Glitch in the System [Video Game Review]

"Metal Arms: Glitch in the System" is a video game released in 2003. It was available on Xbox, PlayStation 2, and GameCube. I have actually played it on all three systems by this point.

This was a game I seriously got into back when it came out. It takes place on a fictional planet called Iron Star which is inhabited entirely by sentient robots. You play as Glitch, a mysterious stranger, who joins the Droid army, fighting against the Milbots. The Milbots are trying to enslave the Droid race. There is also another faction called the Morbots which is an ancient race of robots that live in the planets core. They supposedly were the origins of all the robots on Iron Star.

The lore of the game is actually quite good. The robots themselves feel like real people who just happen to be robots. As they get attacked, they don't just lose health. They might have malfunctioning arms or legs. It really makes it feel like you are shooting bullets at mechanical beings. Everything in the game is built around the concept of robotics. There is absolutely nothing biological. Animals are also robots.

As amazing as the lore of "Metal Arms" is, the game's story is pitched comedically. Everyone is very silly. Most of the voice actors are well-known for voicing popular cartoon characters. Rob Paulson is all over the place. You might remember him as Yakko Warner from Animaniacs. There was also Patrick Warburton who I pleasantly remember as Lemony Snicket from the TV series. All the voices are intended to make everyone feel very real and often very silly, but in a good way.

Warning, but this game is loud. It is a third-person-shooter, and things explode constantly. It is probably the only game I ever owned where I made it a habit of turning the volume down. I just don't wanna wake anyone up. The guns are loud. The metal destruction is loud. The explosions tend to build on each other to just about blow out your speakers. It's a chaotic mess, but it feels so good to go into this game and create havoc.

There is also a really great feature that you get towards the middle of the game where you can shoot a control tether into enemy robots and take over their bodies. This allows you to play at different robots with different abilities, at least for a short time. The way the other robots react to this is hilarious. They'll start screaming things like, "Why are you shooting me?!"

The soundtrack was also masterfully created. It's a combination of metal crossed with electronics that really compliment the game world. I actually own the soundtrack. I've had it since the game came out. Still love listening to it.

The whole point of "Metal Arms" is to have a great time. It gives you a creative world full of talking robots, puts them in a war with one another, and then they send you in to cause as much damage as possible. It is an absolute blast from start to finish with lots of charming and hilarious characters along the way.

Sadly, this game never got a sequel or any remakes. The company who made it were absorbed by people who didn't really care about this license. It's been buried and may never see the light of day again. But if you are really interested, there are still ways to play it. And naturally, I recommend it. "Metal Arms: Glitch in the System" was a game far ahead of its time. It deserved more games in the series. I'll always be sad to see it go.

This blog was written on July 1, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: Chatting with Anubis [Short Story Review]

[I spoil the entire story including the twist at the end.]

"Chatting with Anubis" is a short science fiction story written by Harlan Ellison. It was published in 1995.

This was kind of a short one. The story here is about two researchers, trying to find the lost tomb of Ammon in Egypt. They end up finding a tomb, but it was a bit more than they bargained for.

What happens in this story is they end up finding Anubis himself. This was presented very well and excitingly. I was hooked. Anubis is basically my favorite Egyptian God. Love him. Even the name of the story got me bouncing a little bit.

Harlan did not disappoint. The researches really do have a chat with him, and he was everything I wanted him to be. He had a scary grin with lots of teeth, and yet he was such a very smooth talker. Absolutely had me. Heck yeah!

But from here we find that it is not the tomb of Ammon at all, and the reason Anubis is there guarding it is to keep the person in the tomb from moving on to the afterlife. It's a sort of punishment for someone he personally hates. The writing here really does a crazy job trying to hold back the name of this individual until the last second, so I am kind of doing that in this blog too.

Anubis says that this person was convicted of the crime of "killing all the gods." Because he did this, he has to remained imprisoned in that tomb for eternity, and Anubis is the jailer. He does let the two researchers go so that they can tell the story, but no one will ever find that tomb again.

So who was he holding in the tomb? Well... it was Moses. Yup. So yeah... It was Moses who killed the gods of Egypt. You can't make this stuff up. Actually Harlen did make this up.

Hey, guess what? I actually still liked the story, but I have a sort of bias with Anubis. I do, however, think the thing with Moses is a little on the dumb side. It kind of broke my brain a little just to see that name pop up towards the end. Seriously, what a weird story to tell. I only recommend this story if you're an Anubis fan. He is well-represented in this story.

This blog was written on June 29, 2024.

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Fairy Tale Spotlight: The Deathbird [Short Story Review]

[I spoil the entire story.]

"The Deathbird" is a short science fiction story written by Harlan Ellison. It was published in 1974. It took me a bit to get my thoughts together on this strange, mysterious, and often annoying story to read.

It is well documented that Harlan was known for being a bombastic writer who did not give a damn about the way he wrote stuff. In many ways, that's one of his best qualities. But this story was structured in a way that I don't consider very good. It has features in it that I dislike even in more modern stuff. Basically the story goes out of its way to educate you in the slant of his own personal atheistic views.

The story itself has to do with a man named Stack that turns out to just be Adam, the first human, who is alive at the end of the world. It's somewhat prefaced throughout the story that he was living various lives throughout the history of the world. This story also has it canon that his first lover was none other than Lilith, not Eve. That's a stupid reference that I don't really want to explain right now. It might make some good reading material for you, or you might already know about it. It's dumb though, and it was a hateful thing for Harlan to put it in this story.

It is the end of the world, and Adam wakes up to find that the days of the earth have ended. There's nobody left. And his only friend is the Snake who he once thought was the bad guy. Yep. Satan is now his good ol' buddy. He goes on a brief adventure to find that God is just some pitiful old man that just won't admit that he made a bunch of mistakes. Interestingly, the author compares God to the humbug wizard from "The Wizard of Oz," citing the burning bush as one of his parlor tricks. Ultimately, Stack (Adam) had just enough time before the earth ends to reject God in his madness and die peacefully with the earth.

Harlan uses some extremely pretty imagery of a large bird, called the Deathbird, that envelopes things when they die. It does this to the entire Earth, which I do admit to being rather pleasing in its presentation. But that's about the only compliment I can give this one.

The most annoying thing about this story are the brief interludes that interrupt the story. They make you feel like you're in an atheist class at school, giving you actual assignments that have a serious bent to them. They even make you read some of "Genesis" with some of the verses omitted and then ask you to consider whether or not the Serpent was really doing anything bad. I hated this so much. He couldn't just tell his story. He had to try and shove his beliefs down my throat in such an overt way.

Weirdly, the final chapter of the story is just a dedication to Mark Twain. This is something I do understand. Harlan very likely read "The Mysterious Stranger" before he wrote this. There were similar themes in that one, but they were far more subtle, and I actually consider that a great book.

I do not recommend this book. For everything good about it, there are a hundred things bad about it. It's just an annoying read by someone who had become so hateful of God that he actually joined up with Satan to create an artificial mockery of Him. Steer clear of this one.

This blog was written on June 27, 2024.

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