Fairy Tale Spotlight: Our Divine Spinoff, Part 2

“What are you doing?” asked Mister Nobody.

God looked to his right and saw his Holy Spirit sitting where he always sat. “I am working on something.”

“Working on what?”

“Creating a hybrid. Did you want to watch?”

“Not particularly, but I haven’t had much else to look at while I’ve been sitting here.”

God smiled. I rather like it when you watch me do things… even when you dislike what you see. The things I do here will be as a dry run for things to come. I’m actually rather excited.”

“You look excited.”

God nodded. “Just stay where you are and watch as I do something really cool.” Mister Nobody huffed and crossed his arms. He said nothing more for the time being.

Lucifer walked back into the room just as God was leaning over the table of which was the universe. “Are things ready for the experiment?” asked the angel.

“Almost,” said God. “That card game we had destroyed a good part of the universe, but I don’t think it will affect things negatively. A lot of it was around the outer edges of it anyways.”

“Very good. Have you chosen a candidate?”

“I have, Lucifer. I admit to it not being an easy decision. Now, if I bring one of my good, obedient angels in here, are you going to get along with him? I’m not gonna have to put you in a ‘time out’, am I?”

“I’m fine,” said Lucifer through his teeth.

God smiled and called out into the other room, “All right! You can come in now!”

Upon God’s call, a tall, musclebound angel walked into the room. He had long, beautiful hair and carried a sword and a shield. Chris, who was standing nearby in the room, swooned and passed out from the angel’s beauty alone. The angel saw this and asked, “What is wrong with him?”

God just rolled his eyes and said, “He’s mortal. And yes we can see you are a very pretty angel. Almost as pretty as Lucifer here.” Lucifer groaned slightly.

The angel nodded and asked, “What is it that you would have me do?”

God nodded and turned back to the table. “Come. Have a look at the table.”

The totally ripped angel walked over to look at what God wanted to show him. Chris swooned again even though he was already passed out. Thus was the incredible hotness of this angel.

God pointed at a particular point on the Line. “See that man there?”

“Yes,” confirmed the angel.

“That man there is named Manoah. He has a sperm count of three.”

“Three hundred?”

“No just three. The chances of him having a child with his wife are less than Lucifer ever winning a game of poker with me.”

“Has Lucifer ever won a game with you?” asked the angel.

“Nah. He can’t because I cheat. So you get the point, right?”

“Of course,” nodded the angel. Lucifer groaned again and chose to remain silent.

God continued, “So his wife… I can’t remember her name. She wants to have a child really bad. She’s been begging her incredibly incapable husband for one, and… well… I mean… It’s just not going to happen. At this point, she’ll live and die without any child at all.”

The angel nodded and asked, “Do you want me to kill her then?”

God was surprised. “What?! No! Don’t be ridiculous! What am I? Heartless?! No! I want you to have sex with her. And discreetly. Like while she’s sleeping. I don’t want her heart to stop from how pretty you are. She’s getting on in age a bit.”

“I understand,” said the incredibly handsome angel.

“I mean… You can still tell her about it when she wakes up. And you can even give me the credit. It’s my plan after all.”

“I will do so,” confirmed the angel. “When should I begin?”

“Now is fine.”

“It will be done.” And so the angel opened his wings and flew down into the line to complete his task.

God turned to Lucifer and said, “You see how obedient he is?” Lucifer rolled his eyes.

To be continued.