Tuesday, June 18, 2019

Fairy Tale Spotlight: Our Divine Spinoff, Part 30

“You’re talking about stuff I had nothing to do with,” said God.

“You had everything to do with it,” grumbled Lucifer.

“I’ve just been sitting here drinking from my grape-flavored coconut. Speaking of which… where is Chris with my fresh one?”

“You aren’t listening to me,” groaned the angel. “You never listen. All you ever care about is yourself.”

God furrowed his brow. “What are you talking about? I’ve been listening this whole time.”

“Prove it.”

“Really?”

“Yes, prove to me that you have been listening.”

God made a genuinely creepy face at Lucifer which the angel found a bit unnerving. “Okay, you’ve made your point.”

God resumed his normal face and looked around to see where Chris had gone off too. “So you were saying?”

“Christopher was not just a Cynocephaly. He was one that I thought I could trust. He was doing good work for one of my servants.”

“The king of Canaan was your servant?”

“One of them. Yes.”

“I guess that explains the potions he was making. But I still don’t understand why you had to kill off the whole race if you liked them so much.”

Lucifer sneered. “That’s the part that I blame you for.”

God leaned on the table and groaned. “I’m retired. I’ve pretty much been trying to relax while trying to come up with new and creative ways to dress Chris up. I’ve ordered him a fur-suit. He’s gonna be a feline called Stormlion Fuzzynuts.”

“You aren’t listening again!”

God grunted. “I was just making conversation, Lucifer. Just tell me the story.”

“As if you don’t already know.”

“Lucifer, there are many things that I know, but a great many other things that I don’t actually care about. I let you come over here because you seemed to want to lay something in my lap. I’m letting you. If you want to continue the story, I’m willing to listen.”

“I’m really upset,” said Lucifer.

“I can see that.”

“You never cared when I was upset.”

“Not always true, but whatever. Just tell me the story.”

Lucifer sighed miserably for a moment before replying, “All right… so this is when things went off the rails.”

To be continued.

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6 comments:

  1. Lucifer is a whiny bitch. God knows this and treats him accordingly. Interesting that Satan blames God for a genocide of Satan's own doing. I'm sure he has a sophistry that makes himself look good.

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  2. "Stormlion Fuzzy nuts"... Haha! Funny how Lucifer claims God never listens and blames him for something he had no part in. The Truth is so far from Lucifer's false reality.

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    1. God will always be the problem in his own eyes. he doesn't realize how broken he is.

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  3. What goes in one ear is going out the other. Lucifer should just stop bothering. Quit trying to find concern where there is none.

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    1. I think he is obsessive over it. He's sort of a broken person.

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